Saint Valentine's Day

If you didn’t know February 14^th was Valentine’s Day you might have forgotten about it if you lived in the Netherlands. Unlike the States, there wasn’t an explosion of red and pink everywhere. In fact, stores have started to wheel out the Easter treats and anything Valentine was tucked away in a corner. I asked a Dutch friend with children if kids here send cards to school for Valentine’s Day. The answer was “no” and she said that most Dutch people think of it as a commercial holiday. She then promptly started discussing the costumes her children would wear for Carnival later this week.

I whole-heartedly agree that Valentine’s day is a Hallmark Holiday but find it funny that the dedication Americans (or at least US stores) spend on the 14^th, is nothing compared to the parades, weeks off of work/school, costumes, decorations, drinking, etc. that the mostly secular Dutch people spend on a Catholic holiday. And Valentine’s Day gets barely a passing glance from them. I digress though.

Gearoid and I try not to go overboard for the holiday and have started a tradition that pleases both of us. Gearoid is supposed to find a recipe and cook it for me. It works for both of us because I don’t have to cook and he knows explicitly what is expected of him. Despite being together for over a decade, we most recently had a breakthrough. I have learned that despite his goodness and best intentions, Gearoid will never be a man who accurately guesses what gift/gesture will make me happy. We’re done with games that include subtle hints from me, statements of “you should know what I like,” and conversations in which I think I’m being clear but he’s not getting the point I’m trying to make. What inevitably happens is begrudging appreciation with a hint of disappointment from me (because it’s the thought that counts right?) and frustration that his efforts weren’t successful from him. There was a period of time when I stopped making comments about something looking nice or me needing a new something because it was impossible for Gearoid to filter out what was a hint and what was a simple comment. At one point, he missed what I was hinting at and bought me the hat that was right next to what I wanted and I don’t know about other girls but I don’t want my boyfriend to pick out my flat iron as a birthday gift.

Now I explicitly say I want …. And he clarifies that I want…. And we both end up happy. So this year, Gearoid clarified,” All I’m supposed to do is cook dinner and get you some Belgium chocolates from this specific shop, right?” (I’m usually just satisfied with dinner but living so close to Belgium I couldn’t resist affordable Belgium chocolates.) I concurred and then being the conscientious person he is, three days later he confirmed again what was expected of him. 

Heaven in a tiny box. We actually opened these on February 13th and made a pact that if I shared these with Gearoid then he would share his chocolates the next day with me. Guess who didn't keep his side of the bargain?

Gearoid’s dinners have had their highs (salmon with rice pilaf) and their lows (potato lasagna) but I really appreciate the effort. He researches a recipe, does the shopping, and then spends an extraordinary amount of time preparing it in secret. Something that usually takes 30 minutes to prepare can take him an hour or more. I’m usually starving and have to have a snack before the meal is ready. Valentines’ night, he settled on the couch and said he would wait before cooking because it only took 30 minutes. I gave him a questioning look that sent him to the kitchen. An hour later, I was treated to delicious stovetop enchiladas and Spanish rice.

He did well and was rewarded with his own box of Belgium chocolates and some homemade cupcakes and semifreddo that I had made. The most romantic part of our Valentine’s Day was when I went to bed and Gearoid stayed up and did dishes. No hints were necessary.

Gearoid with his big (and unshared) box of chocolates and a framed picture of his marathon run. I ordered the picture specially for him because it looked so much better than the pictures of me taken during the race where I was about to cry or about to die. He was quite proud and promptly took down real artwork to hang it on the wall. 

I found a recipe that made only 2 cupcakes. It was perfect considering the amount of chocolate already in the house. I also made semifreddo which is homemade Italian ice cream-like deliciousness.